Emotional Clearing

The time of year when we most need to nurture our health and well-being is right now, in the weeks between Thanksgiving and New Year's. Ironically, this is also when we tend to put ourselves last, pouring our energy into creating the "perfect" holiday season for our families. How many of you feel drained, overwhelmed, and maybe even a bit resentful, especially if you're carrying most of the load alone?

This season also has a way of bringing unresolved feelings and emotional baggage to the surface, making it hard to find joy. It may seem counterintuitive, but now is the perfect time to slow down and focus on self-care. Guard your morning routine like it’s essential to your well-being—because it is. Take 15-20 minutes each day to meditate; I promise, this short retreat will actually boost your productivity. Choose one meal a day to make extra healthy, incorporating all six tastes of Ayurveda, and surround yourself with colors, sounds, and music that support your dosha.

Addressing emotions that arise this season is just as important. In Ayurveda, emotional health is one of the foundational pillars of well-being, alongside sleep, nutrition, movement, meditation, and living in sync with our biological rhythms. For thousands of years, this practice has recognized what modern science now confirms: our mental and physical health are deeply interconnected. You can eat right, sleep well, and work out daily, but if your mind is cluttered with unprocessed emotions, reaching optimal health will remain out of reach.

Here is a seven-step process to release pent-up emotions and clear a path toward joy and well-being:

1. Take responsibility for what you're feeling. Often, when others provoke a strong reaction in us, they reflect something within ourselves. Recognize your reactions as your own and take ownership of them.

2. Name the feeling as specifically as possible. Go beyond anger to identify what's really there, like fear, shame, or loneliness. Say, "I feel lonely" instead of "I feel abandoned"; loneliness is yours, while abandonment is something done to you.

3. Witness the feeling in your body. Emotions trigger physical reactions; try to simply observe where they manifest. For example, if you feel sadness, you may notice a heaviness in your chest. Resist the urge to push the feeling away—sit with it instead, and it will eventually lessen. Think of it like acknowledging a child saying "Mom!" repeatedly; just as acknowledging the child provides relief, acknowledging your feeling brings calm.

4. Express the emotion privately. Write it down or say it out loud. If needed, write a letter (that you won’t send) to the person involved. This gives you the freedom to express fully without judgment, allowing similar memories to surface and release.

5. Release the emotion through a ritual. Go for a walk, listen to music, or my personal favorite—dance! Use this activity to detox your body of the emotional residue and recognize the release as you do it.

6. Share with a trusted listener. Find someone who will simply listen without trying to fix anything. Moms, we know this as "venting."

7. Rejuvenate yourself. Treat yourself to a massage, a quiet meal, or a relaxing glass of wine. Celebrate the emotional release and take pride in your courage to let go.

Remember, painful experiences are a part of life, but they become harmful when we suppress or deny them. Releasing old emotional wounds frees us to experience more vitality and joy. And if some emotions need multiple rounds of clearing, that’s okay too. Though this process takes time, it will bring you more patience, efficiency, and yes, joy.